Recently I posted about my frustrations regarding my health lately. One of my readers asked a question that started me thinking. I have made improvements on GAPS, though it's easy to forget them. There was a time that going grocery shopping or getting a chicken in the slow cooker wore me out. Generally that's not the case anymore. There was also a time in which I was regularly in the 7-10 scale of anxiety on a scale of 1-10 (see an explanation of the SUDS scale here). That's not the case anymore.
So there was a time that I would have been happy with my current progress. I try not to lose sight of that. My frustration now is that I'm better but not better enough to do the things I want to. But I should not forget that I am not living in a state of perpetual anxiety and fear. That is a huge blessing. I'm not willing to give up though and stay where I am. I think I can get even better.
Before I did GAPS, I had already made some changes. I took St. John's Wort, and felt like that decreased my anxiety. I'm not sure when I stopped taking that. I had also added more protein and fat to my diet. Another thing I did and still do, is talk things over with my husband and realize some of the thought processes I have developed or picked up over the years. And yes, I do tend to avoid things that I know will cause me anxiety.
I still deal with anxiety and OCD on a daily basis. A lot of my decisions are based upon fears. Sometimes I successfully set them aside, and sometimes I don't. Sometimes it's easier to just go with the fear and do or not do something. I also deal with depression quite a bit. That makes it hard for me to get and stay motivated and to accomplish anything. So then I feel like I am wasting my life, wasting my potential. I am not willing to keep waiting without changing anything in hopes that I will just get better. I am being proactive, because I don't want to stay where I'm at.
4 comments:
Kristina, I'm glad that you have noticed positive changes, and I think it's great that you're still working for more positive changes. I admire the way you research things and make healthy adjustments to your lifestyle. I reach a plateau sometimes and get frustrated that I'm not "all the way" better. It helps me to remember how bad I used to feel, so I can see the changes I have made.
Thanks, Tina. It is helpful to have written stuff down so I can look at how I used to feel.
It's so easy to forget how far we have come. I do it all the time. Good for you though, for not settling with good enough. But don't be too hard on yourself. Recovery is hard work and it takes time.
Thanks, Sunny. Yeah, it sure is a lot of work!
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